9 lessons I've learned from starting my own business.
“More like water, less like rock” isn't just a cute byline...
1. I didn't start out with social media and had to grind for clients. This taught me patience and dedication.
I’m an intuitive, if you didn’t know.
My first ads were printouts and biz cards scattered around on community bulletin boards. I can't remember when my first website was born -- but it wasn't the first year. It was in-person reads, one at a time, learning how to connect with a wide variety of questions and personalities. This taught me how to tune into the cards and also manage a client’s energy.
A Tarot session isn’t book knowledge. You need to have a personal understanding of the cards and a non-judgmental attitude to the soul across from you — otherwise, the session will fall apart as fast as they sit down. You’ll either lose focus or they will dominate the time and yammer because of nervousness or control issues.
You can’t know any of this until you receive plenty of contrast.
2. Personal connection + trust = love and referrals. This teaches me appreciation of others.
In-person sessions gave me the grit to continue, even when my bank account plummeted. I was devoted to my gift — fascinated, really — and admired the courage of those who opened their hearts within 15 minutes. They revealed things not known to many people, if at all. I was safe because I was a stranger who put them at ease.
One rough and tumble guy — a wiry biker who reeked of cigarette smoke and was the least likely of Tarot candidates — was one of my earliest clients. A quickie, I called them — a short, one-off tourist read. It was unlikely that we’d bump into each other again.
Yet we did the following year. He and his wife approached as I milled around the cafe and said, You probably don’t remember me.
He was a memorable character and my writer’s heart loved him.
I do! How are you?
He reached into a worn leather wallet and pulled out a slip of paper. I wrote down everything you said to me last time.
Things got real hot, real fast under my armpits. Oh, man. I thought.
He looked over the paper and then at me. Everything you said came true. I just want you to know that. It really helped me.
I didn’t remember but was relieved he didn’t yell or call me a fraud. He thanked me and I never saw him again.
Personal connection + trust = love and referrals. You help them; they help you.
I have so many wonderful, devoted clients and they are the backbone of Shivaya Wellness. When it comes to intuitive work, it’s personal connection that grows your business. When clients trust you, they will send friends and family. Or they will return from the road to thank you.
3. Success comes from the best session I can give, every time. This teaches me devotion to my craft — and clients.
Were my first sessions as strong as the one I gave yesterday? No. Was my first book as well written as my latest? Hardly. Yet I still exist in both.
Success is allowing yourself the grace to grow, make mistakes and learn from them. It’s showing up for a client, healthy in mind/body/spirit and doing the best you can.
4. I have open hours every day and an easy online calendar for booking and payment. This teaches me flexibility and delegation.
I wasted so much time in the early years going back and forth with clients in our attempts to set up a session. That also meant that my boundaries were stepped on and I’d say yes even if it wasn’t ideal or would cancel on friends becuase I needed the work.
This was a big fail — but what did I know? Gotta collect that contrast so that I can make a wiser choice next time. Thank God tech caught up and I had a reliable calendar. It has saved hours and gives me — and my clients — more autonomy.
5. I choose when I wish to work. This teaches me self-care and respect for my personal time over money.
This is a new way of being — rather than stress my calendar. It was only 7 years ago that I was able to dive into Shivaya Wellness full-time. A 10 hour work week is the max now.
Today I had an open calendar but decided to close to get a much-needed acupuncture treatment. No big, drawn out thought process. Overthink is not my friend. There’s always a reason to stay home and work — but I booked a session, closed my calendar, and left.
6. I erased my debt and stay within my means. This taught financial responsibility and new levels of freedom.
I survived my 20s with credit cards and piecemeal jobs. No judgement because I wouldn't have it any other way but it followed me, even with a solid pre-Tarot career. Once I became an entrepreneur, I accrued more debt which is common. I hated it and debt affected my confidence. I paid it off bit by bit, invested in the market when I could and a few years ago, cashed out at a high and paid off the rest. I LOVE the feeling of being debt-free and will never go back.
7. I bless and pray for every client at the end of a session once we hang up. This teaches me gratitude.
Clients aren’t merely a way to pay the bills. They are essential to the mutual lessons we learn from the session. Nothing is arbitrary and every client who finds me — it’s not easy — has already “planned” this visit long before we meet. I bless and pray for every one, even the difficult ones. We all have history together.
8. I don't need social media for success. This teaches me to follow my own path. It also teaches trust and faith.
I closed my social media accounts three years ago. Some may think this is crazy but I spent lots of time online back in the day for clients and book promotion. It was a love/hate relationship with social media that grew to outright resentment.
So we divorced — and I’ve never been happier!
It's easier now that I have traction after 20 years — but did receive some loving pushback from entrepreneurs at the unusual choice to give up the socials. My biz friends, though jealous, thought I was completely nuts.
How will you survive? they’d ask. I did — because of Lesson #1.
When I closed my accounts, my biz cratered the first two weeks. Of course I was like, RAVEN, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? and slid into worry, though there are savings for dry times. Any business will have slow months — and the entrepreneur who believes that it will always be up up up is in for a big crash.
But still, I worried.
Yet even with nagging doubt, I had no desire to go back online, though FB didn't trust my decision and kept an empty page open for months. They hated that I wasn’t feeding them free data anymore and found it hard to let go.
I don’t miss social media at all — and it’s only gotten worse with hacks, tracking and holding accounts hostage. No thanks. Giving them up relaxes my nervous system and allows free time — plus I’m in a happier mental state to write on Substack.
9. I love my work but will walk away to do something else in the next few years. This teaches me that I am a creator with infinite abilities.
I don't have huge goals and am happy to work with clients for the foreseeable future. Yet knowing who I am — an infinite creator — means that I have begun to move my energy away from Shivaya Wellness. I don’t obsess over my business or monthly numbers. I’ve closed my calendar to new clients. I'm in no hurry to get to the next me but welcome the unveiling as it arrives.
Great insights and so glad you've found these freedoms in your life! Really cool:)